C M Campanella Dixon
HW420-02
Unit 10 Blog
Several times throughout this term
we have had the opportunity and have been encouraged to revisit these concepts,
both formally and informally. I think as the term progressed, as priorities in
life changed and shifted a bit, I have bounced around a bit in where I placed
my focus and what I felt needed to be worked on. I had previously acknowledged
that I need to put a lot more effort into my spiritual development and work to
obtain a previous level of spiritual fitness. This has been my priority, this
is what I felt needed to be worked on in order to gain momentum in returning to
a better state of functioning. Oddly enough though, at the end of this term I
see the largest change in physical development and progress and regression.
Previously I had rated myself at;
Physical-8.5, Psychological-6, and Spiritual-3. I would now rate myself; Physical-8.5,
Psychological-7, and Spiritual-4.5.
Physical I am better at
incorporating exercise and strength training into my daily routine. I was able
to maintain a steady routine for 6 weeks and in the last two weeks I kinda fell
off the wagon a bit. This includes a dip in healthy eating habits. My life has
been unbelievably hectic these past 2 weeks and we have struggled to keep the
schedules previously put in place in order to keep on track. I felt my prior assessment
was completed at a time in which I was very much on top of my physical wellness
so with this slip in dietary focus, but advancement in exercise both individual
and with my family, I will keep my rating where it was.
Psychologically
and Spiritually, I have always known what needed to be done but was both
hesitant and a bit stubborn honestly. I had not wanted to change, I had not
wanted to risk showing weakness and possibly falter, not be able to hold my
family up and do what needs to be done each day to survive. While meditation
and prayer had carried me for many years through a lot of trials and
tribulations, I had lost the “ability” to turn inwards and focus on me, my
needs, and development and forgiveness for my own self. My prior goal set this
term was for 15 mins of “good” meditation time/reflection 3 days per week, and
journaling at least 2 days for week for a period of 30 or more mins. I am happy
to say I have easily met these goals. Honestly, I was a bit surprised that
meditation did come so naturally once again. It was extremely rough in the
beginning, I felt angry at first when I restarted. I seemed to get progressively angrier each
time the first several times and then all of a sudden it dissipated and a
clarity I had previously knew returned. I only am moving my score up a point in
each category simply because despite the change of practices and progression, I
know overall I have a ways to go. I still have not rejoined in formal church
activities, I still do not feel comfortable returning. I have progressed by
leaps and bounds in my ability to keep cool and be able to present myself in a
professional and capable manner. I need
to continually work on my psychological and spiritual development and strive to
implement changes and improvements.
This course has been a bit tumultuous for me. It
forced me to come to terms with quite a bit that I had been holding on to and
not allowing myself to process for about 5 years now. It has forced me to come
to terms with my current state of wellness. I have had to take an honest look
at how and where I have been compensating and look into what I want for my life
and that of my family. It has been an eye opener and a much needed respite from
the currents events in my life. Finding a sense of enlightenment and peace has
been a welcomed challenge. It has been nice to practice these skills and in the
process of reassessing, implement changes that have increased my overall well-being.
I certainly can say I am now more aware of not only my needs, and hurdles to
well-being, but also aware and sensitive to the needs of others. I have been
able to take a step back and see more of the energy that others are putting out
n the world and be able to better work with it to provide feedback that is
constructive and relevant to them.
Christine,
ReplyDeleteIt was hard for me to nail down what to work on first also. But as time progressed the answers became clear to me. My Spiritual Health was in desperate need of help. I did not realize it until I started practicing but that defiantly became clear. I can relate to your stubbornness to practice improving spirituality and Physiologically. I was not open to the exercises at first, but later I realized the importance of them. Its great you set goals for your meditation and completed them. This is not easy with the quick pace of life. This course was also tumultuous for me, I don't like being forced to do anything, but in reality your coming to terms with your personal wellness. I am glad you found a sense of enlightenment and peace. You will truly be wonderful in whatever goal your perusing with this new found knowledge
Regards, Jill Gazelle.
Christine,
ReplyDeleteI loved this blog! I think all of us in this class had some of the same issues with assessing our lives and looking at ourselves in the mirror and asking, "what happened to me?". I feel that I have learned quite a bit about myself and how I need to practice the simplest steps to not only break free of the walls I have built but to be able to help others. I noticed you spoke of keeping your cool and remaining professional. I notice that work has become somewhere I want to be now. Even though the people I work with have not changed, my attitude toward them has. So, I notice that the relationship with them has too. I do not let them get to me. I am always smiling and saying nice things to them and they look at me like I am a crazy woman! In return, they are not so quick to say nasty things or lash out at me as they did before. I also do not attend a church. I have my faith. I know what my relationship with God/dess is and where it stands. That is good for me. Do what is right for you as far as that is concerned. I wish the best for you and hope that we meet again! Blessings!